I cant keep my mouth shut?
I started a new job yesterday in a warehouse after being self employed for the last few years.Today I came across a right miserable old git that spoke to me like i was dirt.but he is just another worker like me. I gave him plenty of abuse back and now I think I'm in trouble for shouting and swearing.I have no anger issues and I'm certainly no meathead but I cant abide peolpe like him that think they can speak to people how they like.What sickens me more is the attitudes of other workers who say things like "just ignore him" or "he's not worth it" bullsh1t!! I dont get paid enough money by this company to allow a complete stranger to speak to me with sarcasm and ignorance. I'm worth much more than that.I know I'll be leaving soon but I can afford to. I'm doing this job just to fill time.So how do you deal with these morons?Do you just grin and bear it?Don't you feel sick inside?what do you do about it?
Answers:
Being nice to an A_s sometimes works, but think about why he is being that way, he has probably been there many years and is unhappy with the way his life turned out and has no other options in life, if you had to stay in this job for the rest of your life, how would u act?
same here i always speak first think later! but i do know that i speak the truth!
there are plenty of idots out there just let the bosses deal with their attitude.
keep speaking you mind i will
just zip it! as always
just blow it off say something funny to defuse the situation!
what you need to do is be polite to him, watching as he bubbles over with furey, until he starts stammering, trust me, its funny, and worth it. just dont laugh till he leaves
find a corner of the car park thats not covered by cctv you know where all the cig butts are and ask him to meet you there and sort it out the old fashoned way
Have you considered that it is you that has the attitude problem?
Just looking at your choice of expression for your avatar makes me wonder..
don't just grin and bear it. he has no right to treat anyone in that way but don't make yourself like he is by retaliating in the same way as him. just tell him plainly that he is not peaking to you like that and if he really can't help it to not speak to you at all. but over all stay calm when you do it. when he finds he can't intimidate you he will stop.
What an ***. People who treated me like that were always met with my sickly sweet attitude. I used to work in a deli and the ignorant people that came in were treated like royalty in an extremely sarcastic way. Usually: would you like this. would you like that. would you like me to eat that for you as well?!
Ignoring a guy like that is impossible, but the more you show that he's getting to you the more of a sick thrill he's gonna get out of it. Just think of him as like, the playground bully!
You don't seem to have any respect for fellow man, You maybe have to change your attitude
make fun of him. make a joke of the whole situation, and try not to get upset. it will leave him with nothing to do but walk away.
just get on with it! like you said your only doing it to fill time, why take the job at heart?
Eat a gob stopper that always stops me from staying something stupid!
Speak up always-I used to work as a cleaner you wouldn't believe the way other people treated me, I chose to do my job just like they chose to do theirs, I was happy doing mine-bet they weren't.
its a form of harresment,you should complain
just smile in his face.. be polite and say "hello" and walk off..people like that HATE it. it winds them up and leaves you feeling smug at getting one over on em lol
I'm sorry to have to be blunt here, but you do have anger issues. We *all* have them to varying degrees.
What you need to do is take the high road. Document his behavior and confront him about it when you are in a calmer state. Use "I" statements to show that you are not blaming him but rather stating that "when you say 'newbie' to me, *I* feel marginalized", etc. If he does not respond favorably to a mature, forward discussion, then you must report the situation to your manager and/or human resources. A hostile work environment is a serious matter.
In the situation you have already built, however, you responded in like, and now have to swallow some pride and apologize for your outburst. If he does not apologize in turn, or does not accept your apology, you need to bring it up with management before he does, or you will be forever on the defensive. If he is proactive and you are not, it will always be his word versus yours. He has tenure and you are new. I don't have to tell you who they are more likely to side with.
Good luck!
I have the same problem of saying what I feel when I should really just let it ride. If ppl at work are already aware of what this person's like then there should not really be an issue.
But if your manager pulls you up about it I would just say that I'm not here to liked I'm here to do a job and I expect respect not ppl talking down to me like that!!
Hope things work out
Oh dear try and laugh it off, here's something to help.
Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak -
the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could
immediately take the words back.
or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did..
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow
and asked loudly,
"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a ********?"
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn't say a word.
he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes,
I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
who works at the store. He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said,
"I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and
passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day,
my sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon,
my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok.
I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust
and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving
"right now" she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a
voice just as threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now,
I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
Even the tellers stopped
what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and
walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard when
the door closed behind me,
were screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training
and I was on him constantly.
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch
in between errands.
It was very busy, with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny,
so of course I checked
my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
The realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in a while.
I asked him if he needed to go,
and he said "No".
I kept thinking
"Oh Lord, that child has had an
accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."
Then I said,
"Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident,
because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time,
"Danny, did you have an accident?"
This time he jumped up,
yanked down his pants,
bent over,
spread his cheeks
and yelled
"SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
An old couple made me feel better,
thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days
and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
in the future, likely think before she speaks.
What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!
We had a female news anchor that,
the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't,
turned to the weatherman and asked:
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set,
but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
Now, didn't that feel good?
I NOW THE FEELING DON'T FEEL ASHAMED ABOUT IT BUT GO UP TO HIM AND SAY YOUR SORRY JUST TELL HIM YOU WERE OUT OF ORDER AND YOU WERE RELAY SORRY FOR WHAT YOU SAID TRUST E HE WILL LIKE YOU AFTER THAT I KNOW YOUR FEELING SICK WORKING FOR SOMEONE ELSE AS YOUR BOSS WHEN YOU WERE YOUR OWN BOSS.STOP LOOKING AT EVERYONE WITH THIS NEGATIVE ATTITUDE.MAKE FRIENDS NOT ENEMIES PLEASE CALM DOWN TRUST ME.YOU GOT TO MAKE YOUR WORK PLACE YOUR HOME NOT JUST A WORK PLACE THE MONEY YOU EARN THERE IS WHAT PUT'S FOOD ON YOUR TABLE AND PAY'S YOUR BILLS.STOP WINDING YOURSELF UP HONEY.NO ONE'S A MORON,LEAVE IT OUT IS THE BEST ADVISE YOU'VE GOT.TRUST ME DON'T MAKE ENEMIES AT WORK.GOOD LUCK AND CALM DOWN YOU WILL COME AROUND AT THE END IT TAKES A FEW DAYS TO GET ALONG WITH WORKERS DON'T LOOK DOWN AT THEN.YOUR A REALY GOOD GUY AND YOU HAVE REALY ALOT TO SHARE AND DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU ANY DIFFERENT.ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD.
DONT TAKE NO BULL#### FROM NO ONE LIFE IS TO SHORT DO YOU.
Do your job and don't pay any attention to him. You bring yourself down to his level by doing anything else.
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Answers:
Being nice to an A_s sometimes works, but think about why he is being that way, he has probably been there many years and is unhappy with the way his life turned out and has no other options in life, if you had to stay in this job for the rest of your life, how would u act?
same here i always speak first think later! but i do know that i speak the truth!
there are plenty of idots out there just let the bosses deal with their attitude.
keep speaking you mind i will
just zip it! as always
just blow it off say something funny to defuse the situation!
what you need to do is be polite to him, watching as he bubbles over with furey, until he starts stammering, trust me, its funny, and worth it. just dont laugh till he leaves
find a corner of the car park thats not covered by cctv you know where all the cig butts are and ask him to meet you there and sort it out the old fashoned way
Have you considered that it is you that has the attitude problem?
Just looking at your choice of expression for your avatar makes me wonder..
don't just grin and bear it. he has no right to treat anyone in that way but don't make yourself like he is by retaliating in the same way as him. just tell him plainly that he is not peaking to you like that and if he really can't help it to not speak to you at all. but over all stay calm when you do it. when he finds he can't intimidate you he will stop.
What an ***. People who treated me like that were always met with my sickly sweet attitude. I used to work in a deli and the ignorant people that came in were treated like royalty in an extremely sarcastic way. Usually: would you like this. would you like that. would you like me to eat that for you as well?!
Ignoring a guy like that is impossible, but the more you show that he's getting to you the more of a sick thrill he's gonna get out of it. Just think of him as like, the playground bully!
You don't seem to have any respect for fellow man, You maybe have to change your attitude
make fun of him. make a joke of the whole situation, and try not to get upset. it will leave him with nothing to do but walk away.
just get on with it! like you said your only doing it to fill time, why take the job at heart?
Eat a gob stopper that always stops me from staying something stupid!
Speak up always-I used to work as a cleaner you wouldn't believe the way other people treated me, I chose to do my job just like they chose to do theirs, I was happy doing mine-bet they weren't.
its a form of harresment,you should complain
just smile in his face.. be polite and say "hello" and walk off..people like that HATE it. it winds them up and leaves you feeling smug at getting one over on em lol
I'm sorry to have to be blunt here, but you do have anger issues. We *all* have them to varying degrees.
What you need to do is take the high road. Document his behavior and confront him about it when you are in a calmer state. Use "I" statements to show that you are not blaming him but rather stating that "when you say 'newbie' to me, *I* feel marginalized", etc. If he does not respond favorably to a mature, forward discussion, then you must report the situation to your manager and/or human resources. A hostile work environment is a serious matter.
In the situation you have already built, however, you responded in like, and now have to swallow some pride and apologize for your outburst. If he does not apologize in turn, or does not accept your apology, you need to bring it up with management before he does, or you will be forever on the defensive. If he is proactive and you are not, it will always be his word versus yours. He has tenure and you are new. I don't have to tell you who they are more likely to side with.
Good luck!
I have the same problem of saying what I feel when I should really just let it ride. If ppl at work are already aware of what this person's like then there should not really be an issue.
But if your manager pulls you up about it I would just say that I'm not here to liked I'm here to do a job and I expect respect not ppl talking down to me like that!!
Hope things work out
Oh dear try and laugh it off, here's something to help.
Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak -
the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could
immediately take the words back.
or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did..
FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow
and asked loudly,
"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a ********?"
I turned around and walked back out and never went back
My husband didn't say a word.
he knew better.
SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
After browsing for several minutes,
I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
who works at the store. He asked if he could help me.
Without thinking, I looked at him and said,
"I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and
passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."
My sister started to laugh hysterically.
The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day,
my sister has never let me forget.
FOURTH TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon,
my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok.
I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust
and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving
"right now" she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a
voice just as threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now,
I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
Even the tellers stopped
what they were doing.
I mustered up the last of my dignity and
walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard when
the door closed behind me,
were screams of laughter.
FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training
and I was on him constantly.
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch
in between errands.
It was very busy, with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny,
so of course I checked
my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
The realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in a while.
I asked him if he needed to go,
and he said "No".
I kept thinking
"Oh Lord, that child has had an
accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."
Then I said,
"Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident,
because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time,
"Danny, did you have an accident?"
This time he jumped up,
yanked down his pants,
bent over,
spread his cheeks
and yelled
"SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
An old couple made me feel better,
thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days
and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
in the future, likely think before she speaks.
What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!
We had a female news anchor that,
the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't,
turned to the weatherman and asked:
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set,
but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
Now, didn't that feel good?
I NOW THE FEELING DON'T FEEL ASHAMED ABOUT IT BUT GO UP TO HIM AND SAY YOUR SORRY JUST TELL HIM YOU WERE OUT OF ORDER AND YOU WERE RELAY SORRY FOR WHAT YOU SAID TRUST E HE WILL LIKE YOU AFTER THAT I KNOW YOUR FEELING SICK WORKING FOR SOMEONE ELSE AS YOUR BOSS WHEN YOU WERE YOUR OWN BOSS.STOP LOOKING AT EVERYONE WITH THIS NEGATIVE ATTITUDE.MAKE FRIENDS NOT ENEMIES PLEASE CALM DOWN TRUST ME.YOU GOT TO MAKE YOUR WORK PLACE YOUR HOME NOT JUST A WORK PLACE THE MONEY YOU EARN THERE IS WHAT PUT'S FOOD ON YOUR TABLE AND PAY'S YOUR BILLS.STOP WINDING YOURSELF UP HONEY.NO ONE'S A MORON,LEAVE IT OUT IS THE BEST ADVISE YOU'VE GOT.TRUST ME DON'T MAKE ENEMIES AT WORK.GOOD LUCK AND CALM DOWN YOU WILL COME AROUND AT THE END IT TAKES A FEW DAYS TO GET ALONG WITH WORKERS DON'T LOOK DOWN AT THEN.YOUR A REALY GOOD GUY AND YOU HAVE REALY ALOT TO SHARE AND DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU ANY DIFFERENT.ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD.
DONT TAKE NO BULL#### FROM NO ONE LIFE IS TO SHORT DO YOU.
Do your job and don't pay any attention to him. You bring yourself down to his level by doing anything else.
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