The things kids say?
Answers:
My son is 6
Well the other day my son told me that his Nanar is not going to see her next birthday! She is only just passed 60.
My son plays with a girl who lives across the road when he stays with his Nanar. She was talking to my son and his Nanar, it went as follows...She said, I am embarrassed as my dad is in his fifties, my mother in law then said it is not that bad, she then agreed and said it wasnt as she had a step dad, my son the said is he evil? to which she replied no he is a millionnaire! lol
I had brought the James Blunt album and put it on in the car, my son was sitting in the back seat.. They had obviously changed the lyrics from the radio version and in one part it goes I could see from her face that she was F***** high (radio version was flying high).. I then turned the song off... A few days later my son was waiting for a taxi at the supermarket with his nanar and he said to her Nanar is F****** a bad word and she said yes why do you ask. he said it was on one of my mummys songs would you like me to sing it to you..and she said no thank you.. A woman was standing behind her and said well I have never heard of that one before...I am so glad it was not me standing there, how embarrassing!
Oh heres another
I got a call from my mother in law (actually shes my ex mil) a couple of weeks ago.. She came straight out and asked me if I were pregnant!! I told her that I was not, My wonderful son had told her that he was going to have a baby brother, but that I was not pregnat and he kept saying but mummys not pregnat. this then made her suspicious like he had been told not to tell anyone and that is why I got the call... No i'm not.
Kids eh!
Let me think I may add more.
Last night I was told by my 3 year old that I shouldn't eat with my mouth full, poor little fella meant talk!
My 4 yr. old STEPdaughter and I were in the store, I told her if she was good she would get to pick a toy, well we had to pay for something else first, she was trying to walk away and the cashier told her
"wait, your MOM has to pay first", she looked at her and said, "she's not my mom", she turned right around and said "come on MOM lets go"
The funniest thing my youngest daughter ever said was during a discussion of what to dress up as for Halloween, she and her sister had picked their costumes and I asked what should I be? She looked at me and said completely seriously, "Mommy, you can be a big fat cow." Needless to say I have never forgotten that! --Ouch!!
my lil sister was with my aunt and my aunt said u know what ur mommy does for a living and my sis goes what does she do ? and my aunt told she dance for mony on tables she begane to giggle and said why would u do that and my aunt said u will soon find out when u are older well when me and my sister got back home she ran straight for mom and said i herd u were a table dancer mommmy and u get that green stuff for it (mony) my mom was shocked and i was laughing so hard my stomache started to ache u should have just herd the way she said she is only 3 years old
a little boy said to his mother..Before I was born I knocked on a lot of doors and no one wanted me. then I knocked on your door and you had a big smile on your face so I jumped into your tummy!This is true and not a joke at all.
Another time this same little boy was in the lift with me and there was a pregnant lady in the lift. He asked her..why do you eat so much rice.?your tummy is so fat! She replied..thats not rice in there its a baby!.he then said "Do you like babies?" the pregnant lady said "Yes, of course I do" He then replied.."Well why did you eat it then?"
Got my daughter a kitten for her fourth birthday, she called it Bizbiz, on the monday after her birthday, I took her to nursery and the teacher asked her if she got any nice presents, she told her teacher about the cat, whom we also call stupid, because it is, a bit. Teacher asked my daughter what the cat's name was, my daughter said "Bizbiz, but we have another name for it too" the teacher asked what it was, my daughter looked at me and said "mummy, can I tell her", I said that she could, I mean, Stupid isn't that bad a name, for a silly kitten, she looked at the teacher and said "we also call it F*ckwit" I said "we do not" and she said "well you did this morning mummy when it nearly tripped you up". I could have died, but fortunately the teacher thought it was absolutely hysterical!
To keep my kids amused on long journeys, I give them a list of road names/numbers or things to look out for. We were travelling home 1 day on the A14 when my 11 yr old son remarked "Mum whats the next road?" When I told him it was the A1, he moaned and said "Thats another 13 roads to go mum!"
At this point I had to try and explain to him that road numbers don't go in numerical order!
The best ever word my grandchildren say is sorry, the hardest word to get out of any ones mouth. But the easiest to say.
i remember when my daughter had just started school and she came home and said "mum,i know the lords prayer" she continued "our father,you aren't in heaven" i couldn't help but laugh but as her school is a church of england school,i made sure i taught her the correct words before her next school assembly
A friend of mine had a daughter that they were trying to get to potty train through the night. She had several mishaps and so they decided to take her girly panties off at night and put on a pull up instead. Their daughter was not happy about it and would get very upset each time her dad went in to get her ready for bed. One night they had just finished the nighttime panty/pull up switch and her grandma called to say goodnight. My friend put his daughter on the phone and she proceeded to tell her grandma that."Daddy comes in my room at night and takes off my panties and I don't like it!" My friend was mortified!~!!!!
i have a 6 yr old and a 3 yr old. we were in a mall one day and my oldest was 4 yrs old, we stopped at the ice cream shop on the way out and this rather large man came in behind us, my oldest son looked up and smiled just as sweet and said u dont need any ice cream your fat already...i was so embarrassed i could have died right then. he said that bc we told him we were getting ice cream to fatten him up bc he is so under weight..well the man laughed said it was ok but i was just hoping the floor would open up and swallow me
When my daughter was about two we were in town and i needed the loo. we went into the cubicle and just as i was finishing my daughter shouted "do you want me to wipe your bum for you". I nearly died as i walked out as there was a queue.She was one of those kids that had to say what she saw on people no matter what and embarrassed me loads of times.
My cousins wife took there daughter, who was 4 at the time to buy dresses for a wedding that they ere going to. When they had finished molly turned around to her mum and said what about daddies dress. Her mum explained that men didn't wear dresses, to which Molly replied 'Daddy does, I've seen him!' We're too scared to ask him about this!
Another time the same little girl was out with her Nanny and she let a lady get past her on the street. The lady never said thank you so molly said 'excuse me lady, I just let you pass and you didn't say thank you, my mummy says it is rude not to say thank you' The woman didn't know where to look!
My son is 2.5 he is full of strange comments at the moment. He lost his dummy in Nursery so they gave him one to come home with, he kept telling me thats mine I told him he had to give it back and it was not his. We went into a shop on the way home. He announced to the whole queue of people " I stole that dummy" I did not know where to put my face.
I bought him some crisps (potato chips) in the shape of teddys. We were in a shop waiting to be served and he was eating them, He said look mummy its a teddy I said yes love and look it has eyes and a mouth he added "and a willy" everyone started laughing.
when my son was four, he told his teacher his dad did sky diving in the holidays. the teacher asked us about it and we laughed turned out somebody elses dad did something interesting,
on holiday one year our daughter really embarressed us we were eating in a restuarant she had finished and wanted to go and play as she was young we would not let her so she shouted tickle me, when we ignored it, she shouted tickle my fanny daddy, MORTIFIED talk about a quick exit.
My daughter is 1.5 and just putting words together to form sentances. She calls her shoes foot (pronunces 'fut') and only the other day when I came indoors with her, she sat down next to her Dad and said 'Fut Off'. Well as you can imagine it took me half an hour to calm him down!!
When my little girl was 2.5 she fell and burst her head open, in a panic we just rushed out to the car and straight to the nearest hospital, when we got there they decided she needed transfered to a children's hospital so they got an ambulance. myself and my daughter were in the back of the ambulance when she starting crying hysterically when we asked what was up she said " i cant go mum my socks are MOCKET (means dirty in Scotland) well we both just fell about laughing, the poor wee soul was more worried about having dirty socks than going to hospital to be stitched up!! lol.
5 years later and we still laugh about it lol.
My son was rubbing my leg (he is 4).
I said whats wrong Michael? He said I need to clean you, you are brown and everyone else is white. I was shocked and confirmed we are all different colours.
My son does say funny things, he is 6 years old. Once we went in a shop and I go tampons and he said "Mum, don't you stick them up your bum" well I nearly died. My hubby was in stitches and I went blood red. Don't know where he got that from.
My 2 1/2 year old sneezed the other night. I wasn't paying attention, and didn't say "bless you" to him. He looks at me, makes a disgusted noise in his throat, and says with a great deal of disdain in his voice, "Bess yew, Geegah!", puts his hands on his hips, and stalks away. (His name is Jacob, but he pronounces it Geegah.)
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