I want a baby am i too young?
im 20 years old. i live with my partner and have been with him for 3.1/2 years. i have always loved children and over the past year i have really wanted a baby of my own. I tried to put it to the back of my mind and focus my mind on other things. Over the past 4 weeks all i can think about ,talk about and watch on tv is about babies and i desperatly want my own. do you think im stupid? or too young? ive talked about this with my b/f should i talk to my parents first and get there advice?
Answers:
your maternal instinct is kicking in.20yrs old is definately not too young,i'm 26 with 4 children and i'm a qualified care assistant,so having children never stopped my career,the timing sounds right.if your boyfriend feels the same then go for it. as for asking your parents,why? its not as though its a one night stand,i'm sure they'd be happy for you.good luck
Be careful what you wish for...don't throw your 'youth' and 'freedom' away. Wait...
i think you are too young. wait till you are like 25.. or 28
i was only 19 when i had my first child so your not to young but does your partner want a child you need to ask him not us
definetaly not- I wanted children since i was 16 and i had my first baby when i was 19- I have been happily married for 3 years and am pregnant with my second child
dreams are not always meant for reality
you never know
but it is a mortal sin to have sex without being married,so think hard on that
i will pray for you
i dont think you are too young there are girls out there 15/16 having kids which yes is too young but between 20 and 25 i think is about right coz when your child is 16 you will only be 36 still young enough to enjoy your life and get a decent career if you want
if your financially stable then sure have a baby its up to you if your ready or not but please make sure your financially stable
get married first
if you're not ready to get married, you're realkly not ready for a baby!
both are lifelong commitments!
well what did your b/f say there are loads of people who have babies at a younger age than you do what the both of you think is best
20 is pretty young. I was 18 when I had my first baby, and although I love him more than anything, I still wish that I had time to be a kid again. When you have a child, you are thrown into adulthood. No partying, no friends, nothing. Really REALLY consider before trying. If possible, get counseling, as well as consider having marital advice. Children can also work on your relationship quite a bit. It causes a lot of stress and can slowly pull you to apart if you are not ready for it.
If you do decide to try and conceive, the best of luck to the both of you!
Get yourself a puppy or a kitten instead!
i dont think your stupid. its quite normal to feel broody especially when you have been with your partner for at least a few years you feel ready to settle down. i think you should analyse your life and where it is heading; do u want to get married? a career? are u financially secure enough to bring up a child? children are hard work. in my view i think having a child at 20 seems a bit young because i feel at 20 theres so much other stuff in life to get through first before having kids. but thats just my opinion, its how you feel as an individual
i dont think ur too young i was 19 when i had my first and i am now 21 and having my second.if ur ready for a baby then go for it.but talk it through with ur b/f
your parents will most likely advise you not to follow through with this. i dont think you are too young. im a young mom and i love it. always wanted to be a young mom and have never regretted it. its hard. the only thing id say to really consider is that you could be being selfish. making a baby to make you feel better when that baby will be the one who has to suffer the consequences of your selfishness. ensure that you can provide for the kid in every way. good luck
It's not that you are too young, but it seems you don't have all the right things in place to care for the child. A secure home and two loving parents. Make sure you b/f really wants a child and if the two of you agree on that, then getting married first is the way to go. That gives some security to the new baby when he/she arrives.
You'll also want to start saving money as it is costly to have a child.
To get the real experience, consider babysitting a relative or friends' child for a week. Make it 24/7, so you really get the feeling of what it is to be responsible for a little human. You could also volunteer in a nursery school and see how you find that.
do chat to your parents. ask them for their opinion. remember it is only their opinion and they cannot tell you what you can and cannot do, but do listen to them with full respect. they will probably tell you that you are too young. the reason they will tell you this is because when you look back on life 20 is very young. when you are 20 you feel quite mature and able to make valid decisions for your own life, and you are. just be mindful of your future. you have a long long life to live, and 20 is when doors are just opening up for you. being a parent myself i see only now how much more difficult (but yes, very very fun and fulfilling) life is once you become a parent. i always tell people to write a list of at least 20 things you want to do before you die. then attempt as many of them as possible before you have a child because once you start your family life you cannot go back to the freedom of a childless person. enjoy your freedom first. some people thrive when they have children young, and some people regret it for the rest of their lives. see if you can visit a family member or friend who has a young child (for a week) and see how you feel afterwards. offer to volunteer at a nursery for a week (one with babies) and again see how you feel. good luck with your decision. its a big one.
Depends on what you want. I had mine at 20 and nearly 22. I found I had more energy and time for them and I was more in line with the trends and music of their time. Now they have both left home and have their own families, I have re-married and am young enough at 44 (young 44) to live my life again. It's brilliant!
i would definatley wait, i thought like yourself and looking back i missed out on alot of things and life was quite a struggle, try to wait a little longer believe me in another 6 or 7 years your outlook on life will totally change, oh god i must be getting old lol
do wot u think is right at the end of the day its ur life...have fun and good luck to you.
yes i think you should have your cake and eat it too.Your old enough now were you can suport him or her when you have it aleast your 20 and 12 haveing kids.
Terri Grantham
Why anyone would go through 9 months of discomfort and pain just to end up with a screaming sucking poop-machine that is only going to grow up and hate you, is totally beyond me. If I EVER have a kid, I'm going to name it Houdini. If it gets past the pill, the condom and the surgeon's knife, it will have to be an escape artist.
You are feeling 'broody', most women get like this from time to time, i am in my 40's and have had that feeling a couple of times, it's natural.
Now this is my advice to you, I had my 1st child when i was 20. I love him to bit's, but if i had the choice again, i would have waited until i was a bit older. I was lucky i had a supportive family behind me, which helped a lot, unlike yourself, the father did not want a baby, and went on his merry way, ( but that's another story).
If b/f is happy with the decision you have both made then go for it. A lot of women start their career's later on in life.
Yes Yes Yes, speak to your parents and get their advice, you don't have to take their advice, but i am sure you will feel better once you have heard their views.
I don't think you're stupid or too young necessarily, but it's important to try to think through why you wnat a baby now particulalry.Bringing up a child is a huge enterprise, and not something you should rush into.its also not ideal to do it on your own if you have a choice, so think about what support you might need. You talk about 'the last 4 weeks' ...has anything happened in your life to trigger this? You should always take advice, talk to people with experience and why not ask your parents, you would probably value their support and maybe help at some stage.. Whatever you decide, you've still got masses of time, so don't rush in until you've mulled things over a little more...hope that's helpful, whatever you decide, good luck!
you and your boyfriend may not be ready to undertake such a great responsibilty at a young age and also please consider his feelings too as it is a big commitment and there may be things that he wishes fulfil before he settles down like career.travelling and he may become resentful in the future for you not allowing him to fulfil them.Dont get me wrong it is the most beautiful thing to have a child as i have a daughter but it was hard work at a young age as you are still nurturing life so take your time and live life good luck.
i lived with my partner ,when i was younger than you are now if you are both happy with it then i dont see any wrong .i had my first baby before i was 21 and im still with my partner now thats 18 years later by the way,and i dont regret having any of my children we have five now
Yes i personally think it is to young!
Have you spent much time around kids? It's not all joy and laughter, plus the expense.
You should concentrate on getting yourself stable and able to support yourself before you add a child to the equation. Remember it will be your responsibility for the rest of your life or until they are old enough to move out of your house (judging by the way things are now that will be age 40).
You need to find out who you are and enjoy life before you do something so important as become a mother. Give yourself time - you are 20 years old, whats wrong with a few more years of Independence to grow and bloom as a human being before becoming a parent!.
I am 30 years old in a long term relationship (9 years) and we are enjoying the ability to travel - sleeping in at the weekends and go out to the movies when ever we want (don't miss out on things like that - you are only young once).
This is just my opinion, your an adult and have every right to have a baby, all I wanted to say was "Stop and think".
I hope you make the right decision for you! Good luck with what ever you decide.
No you are not too young for children, I don't care what anybody says nobody is too young. What matters is whether you have the emotional maturity and stability to bring a child into this world, nurture them, protect them, and teach them right from wrong.
I am sure there will be plenty of people who will answer this question with anacdotes about teenagers who they have known have children and go on to be "poor" parents, and yes I have known a few myself. But I also know plenty of people in their late twenties and thirties whose parenting skills leave alot to be desired.
I was 20 when I fell pregnant with my son and went on to have a daughter 13 months later. But despite having two very difficult pregnancies and my son being diagnosed with Autism at the age of two, I have been commended on my parenting on numerous occasions. In fact at the age of 26 I have just finished a Nursing course, while my husband stayed at home and my children are contented, well adjusted and have achieved alot more than most children their age.
My advice is don't ask "am I old enough?" ask "are we both ready to be parents?. If the answer is yes then I wish you all the luck in the world.
I would get married first and make sure you both are financially stable before bringing anymore into the household. They aren't cheap. And it depends on what your boyfriend thinks about all this also. good luck!
i think you should what until u r about 24-26 bc you dont' want to through away all your free time..but if u and your partner wants to have a baby then i think u should
According to your body you are not too young because girls can get pregnant at nine! Your body is at it's optimum time for bearing a child. The chances reduce as you get older.
You should do what you feel is best. Everybody is different. Having a child young means that you will have your freedom when others may be trying for their first baby. The main question to ask yourself is are you and your bf ready. A baby is not a past time. It's for life.
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Answers:
your maternal instinct is kicking in.20yrs old is definately not too young,i'm 26 with 4 children and i'm a qualified care assistant,so having children never stopped my career,the timing sounds right.if your boyfriend feels the same then go for it. as for asking your parents,why? its not as though its a one night stand,i'm sure they'd be happy for you.good luck
Be careful what you wish for...don't throw your 'youth' and 'freedom' away. Wait...
i think you are too young. wait till you are like 25.. or 28
i was only 19 when i had my first child so your not to young but does your partner want a child you need to ask him not us
definetaly not- I wanted children since i was 16 and i had my first baby when i was 19- I have been happily married for 3 years and am pregnant with my second child
dreams are not always meant for reality
you never know
but it is a mortal sin to have sex without being married,so think hard on that
i will pray for you
i dont think you are too young there are girls out there 15/16 having kids which yes is too young but between 20 and 25 i think is about right coz when your child is 16 you will only be 36 still young enough to enjoy your life and get a decent career if you want
if your financially stable then sure have a baby its up to you if your ready or not but please make sure your financially stable
get married first
if you're not ready to get married, you're realkly not ready for a baby!
both are lifelong commitments!
well what did your b/f say there are loads of people who have babies at a younger age than you do what the both of you think is best
20 is pretty young. I was 18 when I had my first baby, and although I love him more than anything, I still wish that I had time to be a kid again. When you have a child, you are thrown into adulthood. No partying, no friends, nothing. Really REALLY consider before trying. If possible, get counseling, as well as consider having marital advice. Children can also work on your relationship quite a bit. It causes a lot of stress and can slowly pull you to apart if you are not ready for it.
If you do decide to try and conceive, the best of luck to the both of you!
Get yourself a puppy or a kitten instead!
i dont think your stupid. its quite normal to feel broody especially when you have been with your partner for at least a few years you feel ready to settle down. i think you should analyse your life and where it is heading; do u want to get married? a career? are u financially secure enough to bring up a child? children are hard work. in my view i think having a child at 20 seems a bit young because i feel at 20 theres so much other stuff in life to get through first before having kids. but thats just my opinion, its how you feel as an individual
i dont think ur too young i was 19 when i had my first and i am now 21 and having my second.if ur ready for a baby then go for it.but talk it through with ur b/f
your parents will most likely advise you not to follow through with this. i dont think you are too young. im a young mom and i love it. always wanted to be a young mom and have never regretted it. its hard. the only thing id say to really consider is that you could be being selfish. making a baby to make you feel better when that baby will be the one who has to suffer the consequences of your selfishness. ensure that you can provide for the kid in every way. good luck
It's not that you are too young, but it seems you don't have all the right things in place to care for the child. A secure home and two loving parents. Make sure you b/f really wants a child and if the two of you agree on that, then getting married first is the way to go. That gives some security to the new baby when he/she arrives.
You'll also want to start saving money as it is costly to have a child.
To get the real experience, consider babysitting a relative or friends' child for a week. Make it 24/7, so you really get the feeling of what it is to be responsible for a little human. You could also volunteer in a nursery school and see how you find that.
do chat to your parents. ask them for their opinion. remember it is only their opinion and they cannot tell you what you can and cannot do, but do listen to them with full respect. they will probably tell you that you are too young. the reason they will tell you this is because when you look back on life 20 is very young. when you are 20 you feel quite mature and able to make valid decisions for your own life, and you are. just be mindful of your future. you have a long long life to live, and 20 is when doors are just opening up for you. being a parent myself i see only now how much more difficult (but yes, very very fun and fulfilling) life is once you become a parent. i always tell people to write a list of at least 20 things you want to do before you die. then attempt as many of them as possible before you have a child because once you start your family life you cannot go back to the freedom of a childless person. enjoy your freedom first. some people thrive when they have children young, and some people regret it for the rest of their lives. see if you can visit a family member or friend who has a young child (for a week) and see how you feel afterwards. offer to volunteer at a nursery for a week (one with babies) and again see how you feel. good luck with your decision. its a big one.
Depends on what you want. I had mine at 20 and nearly 22. I found I had more energy and time for them and I was more in line with the trends and music of their time. Now they have both left home and have their own families, I have re-married and am young enough at 44 (young 44) to live my life again. It's brilliant!
i would definatley wait, i thought like yourself and looking back i missed out on alot of things and life was quite a struggle, try to wait a little longer believe me in another 6 or 7 years your outlook on life will totally change, oh god i must be getting old lol
do wot u think is right at the end of the day its ur life...have fun and good luck to you.
yes i think you should have your cake and eat it too.Your old enough now were you can suport him or her when you have it aleast your 20 and 12 haveing kids.
Terri Grantham
Why anyone would go through 9 months of discomfort and pain just to end up with a screaming sucking poop-machine that is only going to grow up and hate you, is totally beyond me. If I EVER have a kid, I'm going to name it Houdini. If it gets past the pill, the condom and the surgeon's knife, it will have to be an escape artist.
You are feeling 'broody', most women get like this from time to time, i am in my 40's and have had that feeling a couple of times, it's natural.
Now this is my advice to you, I had my 1st child when i was 20. I love him to bit's, but if i had the choice again, i would have waited until i was a bit older. I was lucky i had a supportive family behind me, which helped a lot, unlike yourself, the father did not want a baby, and went on his merry way, ( but that's another story).
If b/f is happy with the decision you have both made then go for it. A lot of women start their career's later on in life.
Yes Yes Yes, speak to your parents and get their advice, you don't have to take their advice, but i am sure you will feel better once you have heard their views.
I don't think you're stupid or too young necessarily, but it's important to try to think through why you wnat a baby now particulalry.Bringing up a child is a huge enterprise, and not something you should rush into.its also not ideal to do it on your own if you have a choice, so think about what support you might need. You talk about 'the last 4 weeks' ...has anything happened in your life to trigger this? You should always take advice, talk to people with experience and why not ask your parents, you would probably value their support and maybe help at some stage.. Whatever you decide, you've still got masses of time, so don't rush in until you've mulled things over a little more...hope that's helpful, whatever you decide, good luck!
you and your boyfriend may not be ready to undertake such a great responsibilty at a young age and also please consider his feelings too as it is a big commitment and there may be things that he wishes fulfil before he settles down like career.travelling and he may become resentful in the future for you not allowing him to fulfil them.Dont get me wrong it is the most beautiful thing to have a child as i have a daughter but it was hard work at a young age as you are still nurturing life so take your time and live life good luck.
i lived with my partner ,when i was younger than you are now if you are both happy with it then i dont see any wrong .i had my first baby before i was 21 and im still with my partner now thats 18 years later by the way,and i dont regret having any of my children we have five now
Yes i personally think it is to young!
Have you spent much time around kids? It's not all joy and laughter, plus the expense.
You should concentrate on getting yourself stable and able to support yourself before you add a child to the equation. Remember it will be your responsibility for the rest of your life or until they are old enough to move out of your house (judging by the way things are now that will be age 40).
You need to find out who you are and enjoy life before you do something so important as become a mother. Give yourself time - you are 20 years old, whats wrong with a few more years of Independence to grow and bloom as a human being before becoming a parent!.
I am 30 years old in a long term relationship (9 years) and we are enjoying the ability to travel - sleeping in at the weekends and go out to the movies when ever we want (don't miss out on things like that - you are only young once).
This is just my opinion, your an adult and have every right to have a baby, all I wanted to say was "Stop and think".
I hope you make the right decision for you! Good luck with what ever you decide.
No you are not too young for children, I don't care what anybody says nobody is too young. What matters is whether you have the emotional maturity and stability to bring a child into this world, nurture them, protect them, and teach them right from wrong.
I am sure there will be plenty of people who will answer this question with anacdotes about teenagers who they have known have children and go on to be "poor" parents, and yes I have known a few myself. But I also know plenty of people in their late twenties and thirties whose parenting skills leave alot to be desired.
I was 20 when I fell pregnant with my son and went on to have a daughter 13 months later. But despite having two very difficult pregnancies and my son being diagnosed with Autism at the age of two, I have been commended on my parenting on numerous occasions. In fact at the age of 26 I have just finished a Nursing course, while my husband stayed at home and my children are contented, well adjusted and have achieved alot more than most children their age.
My advice is don't ask "am I old enough?" ask "are we both ready to be parents?. If the answer is yes then I wish you all the luck in the world.
I would get married first and make sure you both are financially stable before bringing anymore into the household. They aren't cheap. And it depends on what your boyfriend thinks about all this also. good luck!
i think you should what until u r about 24-26 bc you dont' want to through away all your free time..but if u and your partner wants to have a baby then i think u should
According to your body you are not too young because girls can get pregnant at nine! Your body is at it's optimum time for bearing a child. The chances reduce as you get older.
You should do what you feel is best. Everybody is different. Having a child young means that you will have your freedom when others may be trying for their first baby. The main question to ask yourself is are you and your bf ready. A baby is not a past time. It's for life.
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