Please help! Advise desperatly needed here?
I am only 16 (17 in two months), have a good steady job plus at college and I'm about 7 weeks pregnant! My boyfriend said he isn't really sure whether or not he is ready to have a child but the final decition is up to me. I don't think I could ever abort a child but I'm petrefied to tell my parents. I get along really well with my mum but I really don't know how she is going to take the news. Please any advise what really be appreciated.
Answers:
wow.. there's a dilemma..
The first thing I will say is tell your mum. She is there to help and advise you, that's what mums are for.
Secondly I would ask you what you feel you want to do? Do you think having a child would be good for you at this point in time? If you had a baby do you think you could manage?
Thirdly. your boyfriend has said he thinks he may not be ready to be a dad so you will have to take into consideration the affect this will have on him. It may cause the end of the relationship. but if it does then you are better off with someone who is mentally more mature.if you want to keep the baby that is.
Also, if you speak to your mum she may be able to offer ideas and alternatives to what you may have in your mind already...
First things first though.. tell your mum.. take her to one side and have a one-to-one...do it as soon as possible. She may give you a hard time at first but she will support you I'm sure. She then could tell your Dad who might also be upset at first but given time they will help you...trust me on this
Good luck in whatever you decide..
Graham
I know this is going to be tough but really "the sooner the better.your mum wont be angry for long and she will help you to make the right decision .You need to tell her soon. blesss you and gud luck
i got pregnant on my 16th bday. i just turned 17 in september and i decided to keep my kid. if you do decide you dont want him try adoption. and about your parents, do they know youre sexually active? if they do itll be easier to tell them, if not tell them youre sexually active BEFORE you tell them youre pregnant. i would just sit them down and tell them or if thats too hard, write them a letter. good luck and even if the father isnt willing to be there for you maybe when youre a little farther along he'll decide to step up and help.
Tell that boyfriend of yours that if he was not ready to be a dad, he should have kept it in his pants. Tell your mom, at least, and your dad (or let her tell your dad) Seek out help at a local CPC.
You seem to be responsible, so continue doing so , keep the baby (dont abort) & if you want put the baby up for adoption. There is no easy way to tell your parents, I would advice telling them quickly, if you wait to long or you are showing or they hear it from someone else it will be alot harder. Just tell them you made a mistake & understand that you need to take responsibility for it, tell them you need their support & love through this tuff time. Good Luck
how you in college allready arnt you just in high school. just tell your mom thats all you can do she might be mad but your her daughter and she cant stay mad at you forever
Your only sixteen and you're in college? If you're boyfriend isn't sure whether or not he's ready to have a child that means he's not ready. There are many loving homes waiting to adopt. You can still have the child with out destroying your future, or the child's life.I would adopt the child out. There should be an organization in your area that can help walk you through this kind of thing and help you with your decision. Approaching your parents might be easier once you've decided what to do for sure. It will show them that you've taken responsibility for your actions and aren't just telling them because you don't know what to do.
I was also 16 when I got pregnant w/my first child. I found out the day after my dad lost re-election for mayor of our home town. I was only scared about telling him, but my mom did it for me. She found out because I called her in to see the test when I took it. They handled the news pretty well. I ended up breaking up w/my boyfriend when I was a couple months pregnant because he cheated on me. I had the baby, stayed in school, graduated w/a 4.0 and then I got pregnant again the week after graduation. I was 18 that time. The second one was tougher because everyone was like, "Didn't you learn the first time?" I made it, though.. Now I'm in 23 and in my second year of medical school. Being a teen mom does not have to be bad. I was one, but I will be a doctor by the time I am 26. This isn't the end of the world. It can be a really wonderful experience. Just make sure you educate yourself, and that you're ready for the baby. If you don't plan to keep it, adoption is a good choice. I hope my story will inspire you. You really can do anything you put your mind to.
What ever you do, it must be your decision because you will have to live with that decision forever. Take time to look at all your options, don't feel pressured by anyone into doing something.
You could talk to childline (I know you probably won't call yourself a child, but they help anyone under the age of 18yrs old. Their website has useful information about pregnancies too.
Try talking to your mum, it will be difficult and she will have mixed emotions about it, but hopefully she will support you.
Good luck.
I can understand how scared you must feel. I am 34 and would be terrified dtill to tell mine, because I amn't married. That would kill them. I think you need to look at what's positive for you and the baby. You have a steady job which is great. Are you long with your boyfriend? Even if he's unsure - he's most likely scared too, do you think he'll stick around for you? A baby is a great thing to happen to anyone - it is a source of joy and hope and above all else new life. It may not be the right time and it may come as a great shock, but you will surely get the support you need to embrace it all. Does your mam know of your relation with your boyfriend? Does she know him? If you feel quite stable and happy about it in yourself, then it will be asier to tell your parents. There's no easy way to tell them, but don't underestimate their capacity for hearing shocks. Maybe get a good friend or your boyfriend to be with you when you tell them. have you any siblings? They may be of support. I will be thinking of you and best of luck for it. The sooner you tell them, the quicker your fear will be behind you. Take care of yourself and DO have the baby. All the best.
You have to tell your mum, I was scared to death to tell my mom that I was pregnant, but I did and it turned out to be okay eventually she was upset at first but she will eventually understand that is what moms are for.
Tell your mum about it. Yes, she will be upset at first, but she is your mother, she's the first person in the world who will understand. I advice you to be strong and keep the baby, it's a life growing inside you. I think you are a smart person and am sure you will be able to get through all these. You just feel now that its hard maybe because you are confused at the moment, but once you open it up to your mum, you will find it easier to decide what to do next coz she'll help you.
God bless.
Are there any pregnancy counselling centres in your area at all?They have helped many young women in your situation(no,you are not the first).My advice would be to talk to your doctor first and ask for a referral-this is too big a deal to sort out on your own.No one of course can tell you what decision to make and you need not feel hopeless.There are people who care-including your parents..you say you have a good relationship with your Mom-that is big.Of course she will be shocked,hurt,disappointed and the rest but think how she might feel if she knew you were trying to sort all of this out on your own at your age.Do you trust your Mom and her Love for you?If so maybe you should talk to her after you have let the dust settle and have spoken with your doctor or pregnancy counsellor as well.You also need to know your own mind.You have fast-tracked from being an adolescent into a woman with this pregnancy-like it or not.Your life won't ever be as you knew it but it is not over and many women have found themselves in your situation and have had to make tough decisions either way.This is when your strength of character will come through.Be brave and trust your instincts.Get the facts and give yourself a chance to digest your situation.Families are for life and we see each other through so many good and bad times.I am a Mom with teenage girls and I like to think my girls would come to me with anything.Sure it won't be easy but you have a decision to make and time unfortunately is a factor.Don't go it alone and your boyfriend saying 'it is your decision' needs to be there for you as well.It takes two to tango as the saying goes.Look after yourself and don't go it alone.Best of luck to you.
Your Mum loves you & I'm sure she will understand. You never know, she may have been in a similar situation, aborted the child.etc.
You are the only person in control of your body right now - the law gets a bit more complicated after 16 weeks, or up to 24 weeks where ther is a health risk, (remeber that this is measured from the Start of your last period) so make sure you get some advice. I do not know where you live, but most towns in England have an abortion counselling service that will give you help. At the end of the day though, you are going to have to go with your gut feeling. I have had two kids, and in the past have been the b/friend of two women who have had abortions. I can only tell you this - you will never forget it, but you can live with it. If you are ready to get up at 1, 3, then 5, in the morning (every night for a few months) & change a nappy, then have no social life for the next few years (I did not have my first son until I was 30), then go for it.
If you think you actually want to enjoy being a teenager, then you may chose to terminate.
Only you know what is right for you. I will offer you my love & my prayers. Good Luck.
Tell your Mum as soon as you can. I have four young daughters whom I love dearly. Although I would not like them to fall pregnant during their teens, this is something my husband and I have discussed and we both agree that, should it happen, we would give unconditional love and support and let them make their own decisions. I would like to think that they would be able to talk to us about it. I am sure your Mum would be exactly the same after the initial shock has worn off.
It sounds as though the baby wasn't planned. People have their own views about termination but my view is that the only good reason for having a baby is because you actually want one and not just because it has happened. 16/17 is very, very young to take on the responsibility of bringing up a child especially when your boyfriend has been honest in saying that he is not sure he is ready. I'm not saying that this will necessarily be the case for you but so many times the father discovers, after the birth of the child, that he isn't ready for it and leaves the woman to bring up the child alone.
Bringing up a child is hard work and very demanding and time consuming (of course it has it's rewards too but only if you are ready for it).
Talk to your Mum. Although she may be upset at first, I'm sure she will quickly get over that initial shock and be able to help and advise you.
All the best.
Your boyfriend says he's not sure he's ready to have a child? What make's him think he has a choice? He was ready enough to have unprotected sex! If he's not ready then that's just tough, you should tell him that if he thinks he's not ready to be a father to his child then he's basically admiting that he's still a boy and you need a man to support you through this, not a boy. Tell him to go and play Nintendo with the other little boys because he's not man enough for the role of a father.
Guys like that make me sick, they are just worthless scum that don't deserve their own life, let alone the life of a child who will depend on them. He's not stupid enough that he doesn't know where babies come from, so if he is willing to have unprotected sex then he has to accept the consequencies.
In regards to your mum. If you get along well like you say, then she will understand. Sure, it's not the ideal situation for bring a child into this world, but what's done is done. Your mother loves you unconditionally, and the same will be true for you and your child. Just tell her and be honest, she may be angry, she may be upset, she may cry, but I can tell you one thing for certain, once that baby is born and you pass him or her to your mother to hold the only tears she'll have will be tears of joy.
I wish you all the best. It's never an easy thing, but you will get through this. That's a promise.
Telling your mom is a good idea. I am sure that she will ask you not to abort the baby. There are risks if you do like not having a kid after, which was my case I barelly made it to 28 weeks, and I wanted to abort too.
Breaking the News to Your Parents
Perhaps one of the hardest parts of getting pregnant as a teen is telling your parents (and you will have to tell them at some point). Speak with the father of your child to see if he is willing to be there with you when you tell your parents. Be willing to do the same for him when he tells his parents. If you think it will be easier, you might want to tell one parent first and then let them tell the other or be there with you when you break the news.
You could also write your parents a letter. Tell them you really want and need their support right now. Obviously, you don't want your parents to freak out, but understand that they probably will. Give them a chance to absorb the news and then talk with them calmly. Explain what happened, whether you made the mistake of not using birth control or you used birth control but it didn't work. If you've made a choice about your pregnancy, tell them about your decision and explain how you came to that conclusion. Listen to any objections that they might have. They might raise a point that you hadn't thought of.
If you have decided to become a parent, your parents will probably be very concerned since you are still a child yourself (at least to them). They do have a right to be concerned. It is well known that teen mothers are at a significant disadvantage in society compared with women who become mothers later in life.
Babies born to teen mothers tend to have a lower birth weight, have a higher risk of suffering from abuse or neglect and tend to perform poorly in school. Only a small number of teen mothers are likely to complete high school and even fewer will go on to higher education. Teen mothers are also more likely to end up on welfare.
But just because these statistics exist, doesn't mean you have to become part of it. There are teen mothers who have gone on to success, through hard work, determination, and a strong support system. And it's not only your parents who can offer you support. Other family members might be able to help you out along with some of your friends.
Also, check out what your community has to offer. There may be special organizations or services designed to help out teen mothers. Check to see if any high schools near you offer daycare services that would allow you to go to school and have your baby nearby. You could also check to see if there are any schools that are specifically geared towards teen mothers.
Being pregnant when you are a teenager can be very scary. Don't be afraid to ask for help whether it is from your parents, your friends, your partner, or from a community organization. Remember, there's a reason for the saying "It takes a village to raise a child."
Helpful Phone Resources
In the United States:
Planned Parenthood: 1-800-230-PLAN to find the nearest clinic
National Adoption Information Clearinghouse: 1-888-251-0075
Independent Adoption Center: 1-800-877-6736
NARAL Pro-Choice America: www.naral.org for detailed information about state laws regarding abortion
Children's Aid Society: www.childrensaidsociety.org or call (212)949-4800 for more information about adoption and foster care options
In Canada:
Planned Parenthood: www.ppfc.ca to find the nearest Planned Parenthood chapter
Adoption Council of Canada: 1-888-542-3678
International:
International Planned Parenthood Federation: www.ippf.org lists its entire affiliated offices worldwide, on every continent
your mum is going to be very hurt but you must tell her. she is going to find out and sooner than you think. there are a lot of people out there to help you to make desicions your mum being the most important. after you have spoken to her go and visit your GP
Have you actually had a pregnancy test to confirm this? You should make an appointment at the doctors or your local family planning clinic, urgently, just to be sure.
Sometimes worrying about something so much can actually make it seem like its happening.
Also, the professionals can give you advice regarding what to do next - from the best place, time and words to use to break the news to your parents to your next steps.
Do this as soon as possible, its almost impossible to hide a pregnancy(!) and, if you find out you really are pregnant, the longer you leave it, the more upset your parents will be.
If you are pregnant and if you decide to keep it, I hope your boyfriends stands by you. Good luck.
Hi,
Firstly, it sounds like you've decided to keep your baby, so that's one decision made. If you still think you're not sure, then my best advice would be that if you think now that you would regret having an abortion, you almost certainly will, so if I were you, I wouldn't do it. I've never yet spoken to anyone who regrets having had their children - one or two have said they wish they'd left it a couple of years, but not one would ever choose not to have their baby if they had the choice again!
Secondly, if you get along well with your mum, then don't be too worried about telling her. She'll probably be shocked at first, but I think you'll find she's very supportive once she's got her head around it.
Thirdly, if your boyfriend isn't willing to support you then there's not a whole lot of point trying to make him, but it's more likely that he's just a bit shocked and scared - having a baby's daunting at any age! The main thing to remember if you do decide to go it alone is to leave the door open so that he can be part of his child's life, even if you want different things in the long run. It sounds though, from what you've said, like he doesn't want to push you into anything, so you'll probably find he's very supportive too, whatever you decide.
I hope this helps, and good luck in whatever you decide.
your parents will be shocked at first. but then they will be OK. it wont be easy telling them, but you can do it, just point out that it wont be the end of your life, you can still go to college and work with a baby, everything will be fine I'm sure, the reality is never as bad as you imagine. good luck
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Answers:
wow.. there's a dilemma..
The first thing I will say is tell your mum. She is there to help and advise you, that's what mums are for.
Secondly I would ask you what you feel you want to do? Do you think having a child would be good for you at this point in time? If you had a baby do you think you could manage?
Thirdly. your boyfriend has said he thinks he may not be ready to be a dad so you will have to take into consideration the affect this will have on him. It may cause the end of the relationship. but if it does then you are better off with someone who is mentally more mature.if you want to keep the baby that is.
Also, if you speak to your mum she may be able to offer ideas and alternatives to what you may have in your mind already...
First things first though.. tell your mum.. take her to one side and have a one-to-one...do it as soon as possible. She may give you a hard time at first but she will support you I'm sure. She then could tell your Dad who might also be upset at first but given time they will help you...trust me on this
Good luck in whatever you decide..
Graham
I know this is going to be tough but really "the sooner the better.your mum wont be angry for long and she will help you to make the right decision .You need to tell her soon. blesss you and gud luck
i got pregnant on my 16th bday. i just turned 17 in september and i decided to keep my kid. if you do decide you dont want him try adoption. and about your parents, do they know youre sexually active? if they do itll be easier to tell them, if not tell them youre sexually active BEFORE you tell them youre pregnant. i would just sit them down and tell them or if thats too hard, write them a letter. good luck and even if the father isnt willing to be there for you maybe when youre a little farther along he'll decide to step up and help.
Tell that boyfriend of yours that if he was not ready to be a dad, he should have kept it in his pants. Tell your mom, at least, and your dad (or let her tell your dad) Seek out help at a local CPC.
You seem to be responsible, so continue doing so , keep the baby (dont abort) & if you want put the baby up for adoption. There is no easy way to tell your parents, I would advice telling them quickly, if you wait to long or you are showing or they hear it from someone else it will be alot harder. Just tell them you made a mistake & understand that you need to take responsibility for it, tell them you need their support & love through this tuff time. Good Luck
how you in college allready arnt you just in high school. just tell your mom thats all you can do she might be mad but your her daughter and she cant stay mad at you forever
Your only sixteen and you're in college? If you're boyfriend isn't sure whether or not he's ready to have a child that means he's not ready. There are many loving homes waiting to adopt. You can still have the child with out destroying your future, or the child's life.I would adopt the child out. There should be an organization in your area that can help walk you through this kind of thing and help you with your decision. Approaching your parents might be easier once you've decided what to do for sure. It will show them that you've taken responsibility for your actions and aren't just telling them because you don't know what to do.
I was also 16 when I got pregnant w/my first child. I found out the day after my dad lost re-election for mayor of our home town. I was only scared about telling him, but my mom did it for me. She found out because I called her in to see the test when I took it. They handled the news pretty well. I ended up breaking up w/my boyfriend when I was a couple months pregnant because he cheated on me. I had the baby, stayed in school, graduated w/a 4.0 and then I got pregnant again the week after graduation. I was 18 that time. The second one was tougher because everyone was like, "Didn't you learn the first time?" I made it, though.. Now I'm in 23 and in my second year of medical school. Being a teen mom does not have to be bad. I was one, but I will be a doctor by the time I am 26. This isn't the end of the world. It can be a really wonderful experience. Just make sure you educate yourself, and that you're ready for the baby. If you don't plan to keep it, adoption is a good choice. I hope my story will inspire you. You really can do anything you put your mind to.
What ever you do, it must be your decision because you will have to live with that decision forever. Take time to look at all your options, don't feel pressured by anyone into doing something.
You could talk to childline (I know you probably won't call yourself a child, but they help anyone under the age of 18yrs old. Their website has useful information about pregnancies too.
Try talking to your mum, it will be difficult and she will have mixed emotions about it, but hopefully she will support you.
Good luck.
I can understand how scared you must feel. I am 34 and would be terrified dtill to tell mine, because I amn't married. That would kill them. I think you need to look at what's positive for you and the baby. You have a steady job which is great. Are you long with your boyfriend? Even if he's unsure - he's most likely scared too, do you think he'll stick around for you? A baby is a great thing to happen to anyone - it is a source of joy and hope and above all else new life. It may not be the right time and it may come as a great shock, but you will surely get the support you need to embrace it all. Does your mam know of your relation with your boyfriend? Does she know him? If you feel quite stable and happy about it in yourself, then it will be asier to tell your parents. There's no easy way to tell them, but don't underestimate their capacity for hearing shocks. Maybe get a good friend or your boyfriend to be with you when you tell them. have you any siblings? They may be of support. I will be thinking of you and best of luck for it. The sooner you tell them, the quicker your fear will be behind you. Take care of yourself and DO have the baby. All the best.
You have to tell your mum, I was scared to death to tell my mom that I was pregnant, but I did and it turned out to be okay eventually she was upset at first but she will eventually understand that is what moms are for.
Tell your mum about it. Yes, she will be upset at first, but she is your mother, she's the first person in the world who will understand. I advice you to be strong and keep the baby, it's a life growing inside you. I think you are a smart person and am sure you will be able to get through all these. You just feel now that its hard maybe because you are confused at the moment, but once you open it up to your mum, you will find it easier to decide what to do next coz she'll help you.
God bless.
Are there any pregnancy counselling centres in your area at all?They have helped many young women in your situation(no,you are not the first).My advice would be to talk to your doctor first and ask for a referral-this is too big a deal to sort out on your own.No one of course can tell you what decision to make and you need not feel hopeless.There are people who care-including your parents..you say you have a good relationship with your Mom-that is big.Of course she will be shocked,hurt,disappointed and the rest but think how she might feel if she knew you were trying to sort all of this out on your own at your age.Do you trust your Mom and her Love for you?If so maybe you should talk to her after you have let the dust settle and have spoken with your doctor or pregnancy counsellor as well.You also need to know your own mind.You have fast-tracked from being an adolescent into a woman with this pregnancy-like it or not.Your life won't ever be as you knew it but it is not over and many women have found themselves in your situation and have had to make tough decisions either way.This is when your strength of character will come through.Be brave and trust your instincts.Get the facts and give yourself a chance to digest your situation.Families are for life and we see each other through so many good and bad times.I am a Mom with teenage girls and I like to think my girls would come to me with anything.Sure it won't be easy but you have a decision to make and time unfortunately is a factor.Don't go it alone and your boyfriend saying 'it is your decision' needs to be there for you as well.It takes two to tango as the saying goes.Look after yourself and don't go it alone.Best of luck to you.
Your Mum loves you & I'm sure she will understand. You never know, she may have been in a similar situation, aborted the child.etc.
You are the only person in control of your body right now - the law gets a bit more complicated after 16 weeks, or up to 24 weeks where ther is a health risk, (remeber that this is measured from the Start of your last period) so make sure you get some advice. I do not know where you live, but most towns in England have an abortion counselling service that will give you help. At the end of the day though, you are going to have to go with your gut feeling. I have had two kids, and in the past have been the b/friend of two women who have had abortions. I can only tell you this - you will never forget it, but you can live with it. If you are ready to get up at 1, 3, then 5, in the morning (every night for a few months) & change a nappy, then have no social life for the next few years (I did not have my first son until I was 30), then go for it.
If you think you actually want to enjoy being a teenager, then you may chose to terminate.
Only you know what is right for you. I will offer you my love & my prayers. Good Luck.
Tell your Mum as soon as you can. I have four young daughters whom I love dearly. Although I would not like them to fall pregnant during their teens, this is something my husband and I have discussed and we both agree that, should it happen, we would give unconditional love and support and let them make their own decisions. I would like to think that they would be able to talk to us about it. I am sure your Mum would be exactly the same after the initial shock has worn off.
It sounds as though the baby wasn't planned. People have their own views about termination but my view is that the only good reason for having a baby is because you actually want one and not just because it has happened. 16/17 is very, very young to take on the responsibility of bringing up a child especially when your boyfriend has been honest in saying that he is not sure he is ready. I'm not saying that this will necessarily be the case for you but so many times the father discovers, after the birth of the child, that he isn't ready for it and leaves the woman to bring up the child alone.
Bringing up a child is hard work and very demanding and time consuming (of course it has it's rewards too but only if you are ready for it).
Talk to your Mum. Although she may be upset at first, I'm sure she will quickly get over that initial shock and be able to help and advise you.
All the best.
Your boyfriend says he's not sure he's ready to have a child? What make's him think he has a choice? He was ready enough to have unprotected sex! If he's not ready then that's just tough, you should tell him that if he thinks he's not ready to be a father to his child then he's basically admiting that he's still a boy and you need a man to support you through this, not a boy. Tell him to go and play Nintendo with the other little boys because he's not man enough for the role of a father.
Guys like that make me sick, they are just worthless scum that don't deserve their own life, let alone the life of a child who will depend on them. He's not stupid enough that he doesn't know where babies come from, so if he is willing to have unprotected sex then he has to accept the consequencies.
In regards to your mum. If you get along well like you say, then she will understand. Sure, it's not the ideal situation for bring a child into this world, but what's done is done. Your mother loves you unconditionally, and the same will be true for you and your child. Just tell her and be honest, she may be angry, she may be upset, she may cry, but I can tell you one thing for certain, once that baby is born and you pass him or her to your mother to hold the only tears she'll have will be tears of joy.
I wish you all the best. It's never an easy thing, but you will get through this. That's a promise.
Telling your mom is a good idea. I am sure that she will ask you not to abort the baby. There are risks if you do like not having a kid after, which was my case I barelly made it to 28 weeks, and I wanted to abort too.
Breaking the News to Your Parents
Perhaps one of the hardest parts of getting pregnant as a teen is telling your parents (and you will have to tell them at some point). Speak with the father of your child to see if he is willing to be there with you when you tell your parents. Be willing to do the same for him when he tells his parents. If you think it will be easier, you might want to tell one parent first and then let them tell the other or be there with you when you break the news.
You could also write your parents a letter. Tell them you really want and need their support right now. Obviously, you don't want your parents to freak out, but understand that they probably will. Give them a chance to absorb the news and then talk with them calmly. Explain what happened, whether you made the mistake of not using birth control or you used birth control but it didn't work. If you've made a choice about your pregnancy, tell them about your decision and explain how you came to that conclusion. Listen to any objections that they might have. They might raise a point that you hadn't thought of.
If you have decided to become a parent, your parents will probably be very concerned since you are still a child yourself (at least to them). They do have a right to be concerned. It is well known that teen mothers are at a significant disadvantage in society compared with women who become mothers later in life.
Babies born to teen mothers tend to have a lower birth weight, have a higher risk of suffering from abuse or neglect and tend to perform poorly in school. Only a small number of teen mothers are likely to complete high school and even fewer will go on to higher education. Teen mothers are also more likely to end up on welfare.
But just because these statistics exist, doesn't mean you have to become part of it. There are teen mothers who have gone on to success, through hard work, determination, and a strong support system. And it's not only your parents who can offer you support. Other family members might be able to help you out along with some of your friends.
Also, check out what your community has to offer. There may be special organizations or services designed to help out teen mothers. Check to see if any high schools near you offer daycare services that would allow you to go to school and have your baby nearby. You could also check to see if there are any schools that are specifically geared towards teen mothers.
Being pregnant when you are a teenager can be very scary. Don't be afraid to ask for help whether it is from your parents, your friends, your partner, or from a community organization. Remember, there's a reason for the saying "It takes a village to raise a child."
Helpful Phone Resources
In the United States:
Planned Parenthood: 1-800-230-PLAN to find the nearest clinic
National Adoption Information Clearinghouse: 1-888-251-0075
Independent Adoption Center: 1-800-877-6736
NARAL Pro-Choice America: www.naral.org for detailed information about state laws regarding abortion
Children's Aid Society: www.childrensaidsociety.org or call (212)949-4800 for more information about adoption and foster care options
In Canada:
Planned Parenthood: www.ppfc.ca to find the nearest Planned Parenthood chapter
Adoption Council of Canada: 1-888-542-3678
International:
International Planned Parenthood Federation: www.ippf.org lists its entire affiliated offices worldwide, on every continent
your mum is going to be very hurt but you must tell her. she is going to find out and sooner than you think. there are a lot of people out there to help you to make desicions your mum being the most important. after you have spoken to her go and visit your GP
Have you actually had a pregnancy test to confirm this? You should make an appointment at the doctors or your local family planning clinic, urgently, just to be sure.
Sometimes worrying about something so much can actually make it seem like its happening.
Also, the professionals can give you advice regarding what to do next - from the best place, time and words to use to break the news to your parents to your next steps.
Do this as soon as possible, its almost impossible to hide a pregnancy(!) and, if you find out you really are pregnant, the longer you leave it, the more upset your parents will be.
If you are pregnant and if you decide to keep it, I hope your boyfriends stands by you. Good luck.
Hi,
Firstly, it sounds like you've decided to keep your baby, so that's one decision made. If you still think you're not sure, then my best advice would be that if you think now that you would regret having an abortion, you almost certainly will, so if I were you, I wouldn't do it. I've never yet spoken to anyone who regrets having had their children - one or two have said they wish they'd left it a couple of years, but not one would ever choose not to have their baby if they had the choice again!
Secondly, if you get along well with your mum, then don't be too worried about telling her. She'll probably be shocked at first, but I think you'll find she's very supportive once she's got her head around it.
Thirdly, if your boyfriend isn't willing to support you then there's not a whole lot of point trying to make him, but it's more likely that he's just a bit shocked and scared - having a baby's daunting at any age! The main thing to remember if you do decide to go it alone is to leave the door open so that he can be part of his child's life, even if you want different things in the long run. It sounds though, from what you've said, like he doesn't want to push you into anything, so you'll probably find he's very supportive too, whatever you decide.
I hope this helps, and good luck in whatever you decide.
your parents will be shocked at first. but then they will be OK. it wont be easy telling them, but you can do it, just point out that it wont be the end of your life, you can still go to college and work with a baby, everything will be fine I'm sure, the reality is never as bad as you imagine. good luck
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