Why won't women commit to building families these days? Why do they only care about their careers?
Answers:
I put it down to advertising. Women are told they should be like Carrie from Sex in the City. Work hard, drink with the girls, go out clubbing, get a nice new sofa, L'Oreal I'm worth it, pay the mortgage, new Nokia, keep the car running, read Heat mag etc. Lots of these things aren't compatible with having a stable family, but unfortunately having a stable family isn't advertised in the breaks for Big Brother. Phew, rant over.
Nothing like a good generalisation of the populace to get things heated!
I committed to my family. Unfortunately I have no pension. And a lot of people lthink it is perfectly fine to sneer at me.
Not all women. I wish my husband can get enough income to support us through the month, and then I would most willingly stay at home and commit to building my family solely.
cos we women will have to stay at home if we are to start a family.and cant enjoy the world.its like jail.but all this can change if the guy takes some responsibility at home and tries to do some helping at home.
i dont think that its every woman that wants a career, i certainly dont all i have wanted since i was a child was to be a mother and have a family, having a career was never something i aspired to, but everyone is different, people want different things from their lives..
I am very committed to my family. I would not be without my littel boy of 8, he is my life, however, i do want the nicer things in life for him, holidays, comfortable home etc., I therefore have to work, I am a pa for the director of my company, and i love my job. I think that maybe you have had a bad experience, but most of the working woman I know, do it for there families.
I think you'll find that your generalisation of women is actually wrong. Not ALL women feel this way, personally, I gave up work to have a family and only returned when they started school. I was in a very fortunate position to be able to do this as my husband earns a good salary. In an ideal world, every parent would be able to spend the first few years at home with their children.
It is true that some women do feel the need to gain a career before settling down, but this may be for a number of different reasons, not always selfish ones.
For example, may be this woman has taken years out to study, trained and FINALLY got her dream job.. would you want to suddenly just stop and give up everything you have ever dreamed of? After a few years, she may be able to say that she has had her career and is ready to settle down.
Thats a very broad generalisation!! And if your bothered so much then why dont you make it so you are committed to building the family instead of the woman! Its YOUR family too ya know!
Why can't men be more responsible and do it themselves? Or are they just incapable of being good stay at home dads?
Because money makes the world go round, and feed the kids whether you like it or not
Because dear Bob, the cost of living these days is far more expensive than it was back in the day!
I would love nothing more than to be able to give up work and be able to take my daughter to and from school and not have to pay for a childminder to do it!
Aside from the school run, I actually enjoy contributing my wages into our home! I have never wanted to be a kept woman who has had to ask for money!
You should pull your head out of your ar*e, and realise that this is no longer the 1950's!
Have you seen divorce rates these days? It means that once you're out of our lives, we have our kids, your "two cents" a month to take care of them and no good resume to show someone in order to being hired. Besides, we study, we learn, we LIKE to work and have interests just as men. We love our Independence and as far as I know, men nowadays complain if they have to pay for our manicure, our new boots, our trip or simply a new laptop (that we may or may not use to work). We want to be free to use our money as we please just like you like expensive things and can buy them if you have the chance. Not all of us like to ask. But mainly: we DON'T have to ask because we can do it our self. And one more thing: many of us are wonderful mothers, amazing wives, and good workers. All at the same time. It's called multi-task ;)
Thats not true,your Looking in the wrong places!Hollywood
I don't think that women aren't commited to their families I just think that they judge that commitment in different ways.
I choose to stay at home(my husband works) and sacrifice the holidays and caviar in order to bring my children up 'properly', being here for them, reading and writing with them, cooking proper meals etc are all things that my husband and I believe are more important than Tenerife bi-annually.
Other parents feel that the nicer things in life are not luxuries as we categorise them, but necessities and so they feel justified in seeing their children less in order to provide what they deem appropriate.
I had a very good career and maybe, when my kids are older, I'll consider getting back into the workplace, but I don't want to miss out on something I can't return to later, and that's giving my children what I consider to be the best start in life.
Being at home doesn't make me a better or lesser parent than someone who works, it just makes me a different parent, and at the end of the day the people who will really be judged on how good a job we've done are our kids not us.
if men took a bigger responsabilty then mums wont have the pressure to go out and work,
i was forunate to be in a situation where i could give up work till my 3 children started school, i stayed at home for 10 years which is a long time and i was really looking forward to getting back to work, which was alot harder than i tought it would be.
i think mums try alot harder to raise a family, keep home tidy, and try and have a comfortable life for them and their children.
lots of women are independent because they have to be
That is an incredibly huge generalisation. Women can be equally committed to their careers & their families. This is 2006, not 1946! If you want to go with your generalisation, maybe women are less inclined to commit to families i.e. getting married & having kids because men these days are too unreliable & cannot be counted upon to provide for women/children the way they used to. Nor can they be counted on to keep it in their pants & not request a divorce when the going gets a little tougher. Maybe the woman behind this question is not the problem. The man asking it is.
I think its what a women has to go through she needs a trustworthy husband not one that would leave her all by herself one day to look after the kid, and its allot of responsiblty , and todays time a women can become anything she wants, long time ago women had to be maybe a house wife but not any more
and we women want to enjoy rather than beign tied to a kid , its also the freedom a women wants and mainly a security for that she has to find a suitable partner willing to be with her always
They've been brainwashed by feminism and the media that they need to "do it all" to be happy. They get the idea that it's what everybody else is doing, so they follow along like lemmings over a cliff. The end result is that they spread themselves too thin to effectively create a family, whether they express a desire to or not.
Family must be the priority.not just one item on a list. It must be second to nothing. Many women (and men) have lost this concept.which is a big part of the reason why we have so many dis functional familes these days that spit out immature young adults with equally twisted ideas about priorities in their own lives.
What's also sad is that very few of these women are happy.though they'll never admit it for fear of not living up to the norm that's depicted in the media.which really isn't the norm, but you can't tell them that.
From my point of view, the family unit is the most important thing. Briefly, I came from a broken home and was placed in foster care for 9 years until I turned 16. I married very young the first time. But I still knew i wanted to go to college. I wanted to, because I needed to prove to myself that I could overcome the odds. I did. My first marriage of 18 years failed. Due to abuse, not my career. Now that I am secure financially and have remarried to a wonderful man. I am ready for a family at the age of 37. For me, it is security and support of a loving husband who will be a loving father as well. Yes I am willing to give up my career and be a fulltime wife and mother. I love taking care of my husband and my home, and a baby now would be perfect. We shall see...
Not all women are unwilling to commit to building families.
Those that are, and choose to focus on their careers, do so in greater numbers now than previously because they now have the opportunity to do so and are not forced into motherhood when they do not want it.
Personally, I am choosing not to have a family because I have yet to meet a man I can trust enough to have children with, and although I've not given up hope entirely, I'm not expecting to find one. I'd rather throw myself into my career than bring any children into a family and a world which will be shattered by pain, betrayal, loss, and sorrow.
You might as well ask why men won't commit to building families, and only care about their careers.in this culture it's almost an equally (ir)relevant question.
Family life has changed so much, since the 1960's and before. At that time there was only one 'bread winner' - the man, the woman stayed home; ran the house and raised the kids. Over time this has changed dramatically. When my children were small (I had them all in the 1970's) I stayed home and loved it.
We wanted to buy a house but were told, by a lending institution, that it took 2 incomes to buy a house - without me working there was just no way we could buy one. So, we rented and I remained home until my youngest began school.
Ever since then the world has opened up, so much, to women. There's just so many opportunities out there for us that in order for us to get what we really want (without being a big burden on our husband's income) - we must have a career. Now careers are more important than a family. The focus, now, is 'how much will we have to retire on'.. Without 2 incomes - retirement is more of a burden to family members than to be able to remain in your own home or live comfortably.
if men committed to their families half as much as women did..the whole thing would be a lot easier to do.
i got divorced because my husband cheated on me and because he was angry about getting caught he went and got a job making half as much so he wouldn't have to pay much child support and alimony..
so..where does that leave me after eleven years of being faithful to a man that turned into a louse..i gave up my career so he could have one of those 'well built' families that you ask about and now here i am left working at walmart for peanuts so i can pay the rent on my cruddy apartment..and so i can feed my kids..he certainly isn't doing that, or doing their homework with them, or reading to them at night.
THAT is the reason women choose carreers over families these days..because they have far too much to lose if they don't.
In the past, women's sole allowed purpose was to raise family's. They could not work (well, not in an paying job anyway, they had excessive housework.) and what you describe sounds like the exact opposite of the past.
Honestly, I'd prefer a career in mechanical engineering.
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